Dear Crabby,

I have been going through something awful. I am always getting after my husband.

At night, he moves all over, snores, also makes strange noises in his throat, like grunting, and he's always putting his arms up and over behind his head when he's awake. He's also getting a big potbelly. And he's only 39.

I've become so irritated that I've begun popping my fingers and one wrist. I've also taken to sleeping with my baby at night and haven't slept with Mr. P.B. (potbelly) for awhile. I'm getting hot, too, even at night, during the day, anytime.

I need help. I don't want to be a nag.

— Helena

Dear Helena,

Men will always do strange things, and you don't notice them until you become stuck in the "pause" mode. Bide your time until it passes. Life will get better. This too shall pass.

— Crabby

Another blond chick joke:

A white chick got hooked up with a very handsome Native guy and they had a beautiful baby girl who resembled the father.

One day the mother commented while holding and gazing upon her sleeping infant: "She is so beautiful. I don't even know if I'm the mother."