Dear Crabby,

The other day, I found some letters written to my boyfriend in his stuff.

I guess I had a suspicion that something fishy was going on. So when he wasn't home, I took the liberty to check out his meager belongings and found the letters from an overseas girl.

I assume she is looking for a quick relationship based on what she wrote: "Yes, I very much would like to be married to an American," was her reply to an obvious question he asked her.

It made me so angry that I looked for something to get back at him with. I am a girl from the Midwest, and I don't cotton to being used like I am. He's so sneaky and can't be trusted with anything.

What shall I do? I'm afraid of him since he is a karate guy. He might chop me down with one hand.

— Sue

Dear Sue:

There's only one thing to do. Burn up his karate suit.

— Crabby

Joke of the day:

On a morning radio show where people call in and inform listeners about what they have for sale, one guy with a Native American accent called in to say he had 10 pigs for sale and he gave the program a telephone number.

It was the number of the BIA police station.